and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
