You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
