Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
