..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
you would pick up someone in the library
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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