i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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