You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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