I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize