My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
