I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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