it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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