Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize