i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
