also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Randomize
