my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
