Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
