Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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