I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
