I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
