i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
