Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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