And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
