Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
