so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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