come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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