i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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