All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
