what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize
