He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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