Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
