Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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