Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
It's shark week go big or go home
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
