About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
NoShamevember. You game?
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Randomize
