they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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