She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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