I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
