and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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