I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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