We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
We need to rekindle our bromance
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
