I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize
