Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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