Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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