I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I am one with the molecules
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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