Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
