At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
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