I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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