I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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