Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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