READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
