He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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