I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
