He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
