Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
